Comments on: Baby Sleep Training – not crying themselves to sleep

By: pew

pew — Sun, 07 Mar 2010 09:41:43 +0000

Well done Sam for finding your stance on this. It is so important to be confident with your decision and stand by it in the face of ridicule from others. It will pay off in the end. Our second darling is now almost 15 months. We’ve been able to put her down and leave her to fall asleep by herself already for the last 2 months. She just did it by herself, it needed no work on our part really. She shares a room with her older sister who turned 3 yesterday. They both go to sleep without any complaints and sleep all the night through. And it still happens sometimes that one of them wakes in the night and comes into bed with us. I really enjoy that! It doesn’t do any harm, in fact it gives them more security knowing that you’re always there for them. The next night they just go back to their own bed, no problems. Keep at it, you’ll end up with such loving children as a result.

By: Sam

Sam — Sun, 07 Mar 2010 08:31:58 +0000

Thanks Pew. As a first time Mum I’ve been shocked by the very widespread attitude that leaving your baby to get distressed is teaching them to sleep! I’ve been worried about it all year, worried that if I co-sleep and rock to sleep I will raise a terrible sleeper or never have any sleep myself again. Worried that I am spoiling her, that she ‘needs to know who’s boss’, that I am too soft for motherhood. I have finally found the confidence I needed to continue on as we were, because it feels right and because they are so small for such a small amount of time. I wish that this attitude weren’t so all-pervading and that we were given advice on other methods and on coping with sleep deprivation rather than a so-called quick fix. Thanks for your article and response, My little girl is 1 this week and she can go to sleep on her own when she is comfortable enough to do so.

By: pew

pew — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 09:28:15 +0000

Thank you Sam. Yes, we’re certainly glad we did it the way we did and can’t imagine doing it any other way. She was 18 months when we started leaving the room to let her fall asleep by herself. She started already asking to get into bed before falling asleep probably a month or two before that but we stayed in the room. Every child is different and you’ll have to work out when yours is ready. Our second one is now 13 months and I can tell already that she’ll probably reach that stage much sooner. We just feel that them falling asleep, feeling safe and secure is such a vital step in their whole future and their own development. To us it’s very logical and it makes me very sad when I hear of people letting their little ones cry themselves to sleep. I wish you luck and please persevere with it, it will be rewarded a hundred times over with a very happy, secure, confident child.

By: Sam

Sam — Mon, 11 Jan 2010 07:35:08 +0000

What a heartening read, I hope you’re suitably proud of yourselves for taking this route and inspiring others to do the same! It isn’t easy and I agree with everything you say here re compassion, consistency and trust. I’m at the 10 month stage – do you mind me asking how old your little one was when she would actually ask to get into bed, when you began to think about her being able to fall asleep without you in the room?

By: Julie

Julie — Tue, 07 Apr 2009 08:20:28 +0000

Wow… As usual I am amazed with everything I have been learning and looking forward to everything you guys will teach me! It makes all absolute sense and the great thing is, we can actually create our own methods, depending on each child, parent, culture and circumstances.
It seems like the trick is : listen and respond to your child. Whatever happens. Your child is expressing all those emotions to you because he/she trusts you, and through you, him/herself. He/she is identifying him/herself through you. Don’t let them down!